I’m ready. Almost.
As I reorganize my closet, and pack for a much deserved getaway weekend. I have a plan on my face knowing this will be the last hurrah before my impending cancer screenings trip to New York. The results will determine the final step for my next destination with Bobby to Turks and Caicos, a trip I’ve wanted to take for a very long time. Then last, to home to where I grew up.
I’m determined to make the most of these trips, regardless of my results. Timing if they’ll have to treat me again will be the only denominator, and or obstacle. Once all of the upcoming traveling is finished I will begin a new career. One that is intertwined with the writers job I have now. These fingers are packing as though I already received a clean bill of health. This is my only second of five years of tests, and yet each visit awakens me to something new I want to accomplish, see, renew. While accepting what I can not change as well.
If only we all thought like that with every morning, without the cloud of the unknown hanging out in the back of our minds to motivate us to better things.
That makes me think. Recently I signed a guest book for a high school friend that passed away. As I wrote, I thought to myself what I think every single time, how we have pleasant beautiful thoughts on a person, after they’re dead. Ever since the doctors told me that cancer was so close to my trachea, I have wholeheartedly tried to live, travel, and talk as though I croaked and got to come back.
So my heart just feels grateful to be here. I did think it was as funny as you will find it, that the cancer team all suggested to avoid stress. Even with a thyroid removed the cancer can return, but they are worried about my trachea. I see it in their trained eyes, and feel it in their grip as they routinely thoroughly inspect the area and take pictures of my voice box.
Yes. I’m a little concerned because I had a highly eventful, stressful last year. Every time my perimenopause gave me a migraine I assumed like morning toast popping up, a new brain lesion was forming. The positive? When something happens to a sane person over and over again, it has little to zero effect of pain or worry on you.
Nevertheless, speechless or talkative, I will once again be traveling with new eyes. After all, that is the ultimate voyage.
**To the email followers: Sorry about the mishap with duplicate videos last time!**